The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer. Enjoy.

They're Going To Need a Bigger Boat. Before we get to this week's Brewmeister Ratings, a few cynical words about the San Jose Sharks. At second overall in the Western Conference, some fans don't believe there's a hell of a lot to bitch about. But last night's 4-3 overtime disintegration against Anaheim spotlighted three of San Jose's lingering migraines: A potentially apocalyptic goaltending situation, defenseman and "Chernobyl's finest living monster" Alexei Semenov, and Jonathan Cheechoo, the biggest tease since Jennifer Love Hewitt -- right around "Can't Hardly Wait" and before the pudding ass.

I suppose Ron Wilson has a really well thought-out reason for giving Evgeni Nabokov his first night off in 44 games against the division rival Stanley Cup champions instead of the night before against the expansion Leafs. Especially since it resulted in rookie and boring interview Thomas Greiss giving up four goals on 29 shots to the Ducks, including Doug Weight's lucky deflection with 27.7 left in regulation to tie it and Francois Beauchemin's quick game-winner 33 seconds into OT. The lack of any decent back-up for Nabokov could be a serious deficiency as the postseason nears, leading to talk that an ancient CuJo could land in San Jose - which, according to team sour...

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