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19
OFFSEASON MOVES YOU MISSED: DONTE' STALLWORTH'S OPTION NOT PICKED UP
Posted February 19th ago via Epic Carnival 
1 Dirtlocker Point for each player mentioned in this post:
The following is a portion of the full post
Images and full post at Epic Carnival
By Zac, Throwing Into Traffic
Offseason Moves You Missed is a feature that will highlight the NFL offseason action that didn't receive as much attention as it deserved.
Donte' Stallworth has an alien in his head. At least, that's what he told reporters. The Patriots, for what it's worth, couldn't care less; by all accounts, they'll be choosing not to pick up Stallworth's option for next year. It's the right move, too, because while Stallworth may or may not have an alien living inside of him, that Randy Moss guy who lines up on the opposite side of the field DEFINITELY has a huge asshole living inside of him, and it will be coming out if New England fails to come up with boatloads of new contract cash. As a result, sacrifices need to be made, and Stallworth's $6 million dollars due had the team exercised his option will be one of them.
Of course, in the machine that was the New England pass attack last season, Stallworth was the odd man out, making this process look deceptively simple. If we look again, however, I'm not so sure that the Pats would be as comfortable letting him go as reports indicate. Quick question: How does undersized, average speed white guy Wes Welker become the most popular receiver in the New England area on a team with Randy Moss? Answer: A long history of subtle, behind closed doors racism. Also answer: He led the league in receptions by beating linebackers on his routes all day, every day, and in case you're wondering, his hands and his great work ethic' (read: Pollyanna whiteness) i...
Read the full post at Epic Carnival
Images and full post at Epic Carnival
By Zac, Throwing Into TrafficOffseason Moves You Missed is a feature that will highlight the NFL offseason action that didn't receive as much attention as it deserved.
Donte' Stallworth has an alien in his head. At least, that's what he told reporters. The Patriots, for what it's worth, couldn't care less; by all accounts, they'll be choosing not to pick up Stallworth's option for next year. It's the right move, too, because while Stallworth may or may not have an alien living inside of him, that Randy Moss guy who lines up on the opposite side of the field DEFINITELY has a huge asshole living inside of him, and it will be coming out if New England fails to come up with boatloads of new contract cash. As a result, sacrifices need to be made, and Stallworth's $6 million dollars due had the team exercised his option will be one of them.
Of course, in the machine that was the New England pass attack last season, Stallworth was the odd man out, making this process look deceptively simple. If we look again, however, I'm not so sure that the Pats would be as comfortable letting him go as reports indicate. Quick question: How does undersized, average speed white guy Wes Welker become the most popular receiver in the New England area on a team with Randy Moss? Answer: A long history of subtle, behind closed doors racism. Also answer: He led the league in receptions by beating linebackers on his routes all day, every day, and in case you're wondering, his hands and his great work ethic' (read: Pollyanna whiteness) i...
Read the full post at Epic Carnival
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About Epic Carnival:
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Related Images
Dwayne Jarrett via Flickr.com












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